Chris

Life of Pi

Shot with utmost care,

Every frame is priceless art;

Beauty incarnate.

The Hobbit

One book—three films. Why?

Jackson’s winded, winding tale:

All filler, no fun.

Zero Dark Thirty

Steely, steel-cold work;

Not war song, but elegy.

Apolitical.

Django Unchained

Slavery and race

Subject to Q’s mockery—

Shameful; a disgrace.

Ilia

Hyde Park on Hudson

Borderline incest,

In plot like flat June champagne.

King George visits too.

This is 40

Turning forty, huh?

Near broke; wife nags; Viagra.

At least you’re not dead.

Gangster Squad 

Riddled with bullets

Made of highest grade boredom.

Gosling still handsome.

Django Unchained

Waltz, DiCaprio

Make love to the camera;

Foxx penis steals show.